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Success Principle #9: Take Good Looking Loser's Life or Death Test

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Life or Death Test


This is the most simple concept among our Success Principles but one of the most important. 

There are so many personal improvement and success websites, many of them - quite good, that discuss the notion of "feeling alive" and "living" rather than "going through the motions" and "existing".

Often, however, very few address the fact that if you are a GOAL-DRIVEN person - relentlessly attacking ONE GOAL, the vast majority of your free (non-work/school) waking hours are AND SHOULD BE spent working on that goal.

Relentlessly attacking ONE GOAL is usually most productive and efficient when it becomes a deliberate, organized, daily routine, allowing you to operate on near auto-pilot to get one step closer to your ultimate goal.

Daily routines, however, lend themselves more to "going through the motions" and "existing" moreso than "feeling alive" and "living".

The trade-off is achievement/productivity for life/fun. 

Obviously, a balance needs to be struck.

The good news is, if you are a reader of - the goal of improving your social/sex life can be quite exciting once you beat most of your approach anxiety. Excitement can be had while progress is made. Don't believe undersexed males that claim that 'having relations' with the opposite sex isn't fun or rewarding. 

Most other goals, however, don't offer as much of a daily "rush". 

I'm not sure from whom I heard this question, but it got me thinking -

In the past year, the past 365 days, how many days do you remember?

When I was asked this in the year 2007, I could list 8 days that I remembered.

Six of the days I did something fun and memorable that I vividly remembered.

One of the days I received a scholarship to Law School at University of San Diego.

One of the days something distinctly bad happened. (really bad fight with my parents)

Just a grand total of 8 days.

Not many.

The fact that I couldn't really remember having double-digit "fun days" scared me.

I swore, compared to other people, I was alive.

Yet, by my own standards (see below), I was barely breathing. 

Life Or Death-front-large

Good Looking Loser's Life or Death Test

I've decided to modify the question a little bit for my own personal "Life or Death" Test.

I'll ask you now -

In the past year, the past 365 days, how many days do you remember when you had fun?

You have 5 minutes.

Think about it.

In fact - write them down.

Use bullet points.

It only counts as a point if you remember WHAT YOU WERE DOING - you don't need to name the date, just the specific activity or reason.

If your favorite sports team won a championship or something and you got drunk to celebrate - I'll let you count that for ONE and ONLY ONE. We want to focus on YOU and not the accomplishments of others that make you warm and fuzzy inside.

It helps to think ALL the way back to exactly a year ago.

- What were you doing last May? Where are you?
(or whatever month we are currently in)

If it's still fuzzy, that's okay - look at your bank statement to see where you spent money a year ago.

You can also look at your Facebook status or Tweets, if you had been using those.

Referring back to time/place is only to get the ball rolling; I don't want you to look at your full bank statement/social media over the past year and saying "oh yeah, I had fun that day..." (that's not really REMEMBERING IT)

clipart question mark

So How Did You Do?

If you could recall -

  • 15+ fun days and the activity/reason it was memorable, you are doing just fine and your memory is pretty solid.
  • 9-14 fun days and the activity/reason it was memorable, that is above-average, but you could still probably use my ultimate suggestion.
  • 5-8 fun days and the activity/reason it was memorable, this is average, make sure you read my advice below.
  • 3-4 fun days and the activity/reason it was memorable, this is below-average, I hope you have accomplished some stuff because you aren't particularly alive.
  • 0-2 fun days and the activity/reason it was memorable - you are depressed and not leaving your house/head enough. You know it too.

Regardless of how many memorable experiences you remembered, chances are, you had even more 'fun days' - our figures are adjusted for understandable memory lapses.

Don't be bummed out if you can only remember a handful of days or events. 

I'm going to make my point/suggestion in about 60 seconds.

robot man

My Results

Ever since I scored a sad "6 fun days" back in 2007, I've made a point at making sure I was planning fun and creating memories.

Looking back from May 2013 to May 2014, I could list 15 fun/memorable things in just 60 seconds (you are allowed 5 minutes) and my memory ain't so good -

  • Bought my first sick handgun, put a laser sight on it and shot things out in the desert.
  • Went to Las Vegas, NV. for a week.*
  • Went on a road trip to Oregon.* 
  • Went to Portland, OR for a week.*
  • Went to Chicago. IL for a week.*
  • Went on a road-trip to Reno, NV.*
  • Went on a road-trip to Salt Lake City, UT.*
  • Went to a red carpet event in Hollywood, CA.
  • Met and talked to former supermodel Rebecca Romijn for a while. (she was my neighbor in LA, random)
  • Took archery lessons at an indoor range.
  • Did a photoshoot.
  • Went to a professional basketball game and was in a contest in front of thousands of people. (I fell on my face)
  • Met up with Good Looking Loser's own PhilTheBeard in South Florida, went bowling and miniature golfing.
  • Raised money for a Good Looking Loser contractor that lost his house during the Philippine typhoon.
  • Met Victor from Bold & Determined
  • Shot professional videos (for the 1st time) of me picking up girls. (last weekend)
    * the trips had several specific days, but this blog is PG so I won't get into it.

I was able to pinpoint these 'fun days' so quickly because I made a conscious and deliberate effort to have them.

They were fun but they also serve as a reminder that I am, in fact - ALIVE.

flying bear clipart

My Point

If you've found yourself to this site and to the bottom of this article, I'm going to assume you are into "self-improvement", probably a hard worker and likely have big dreams.

That's good.

I've come to realize, based on myself, my prettier but less-sexually active previous self and the other guys around the Good Looking Loser Community, that most of us have the whole "HARD WORK thing" down.

What is harder to sell, somehow, is the importance of HAVING FUN. 

So many of us have accepted the fact that sacrificing as much of the present as possible will yield a better future.

In some ways, we are the polar opposite of normal people.

In most cases, that is a good thing. A very good thing.

Yet, in some cases, it's not always a good thing.

In a few discussions including, "21 Things You Can Do Today to Stop Being Negative" (#18), "19 Things You Need to Do in 2014" (#3) and "34 Orthodox and Unorthodox Suggestions to Get Motivated to Hit the Gym" (#15) and also to a lesser degree in "30 Things I Wish I Knew In My 20's" (#29) - I've stressed the importance of making a conscious effort to schedule time to HAVE FUN and REWARD YOURSELF.

My general suggestion is -

(it's okay if the new experience isn't crazy fun, but if it is memorable - it counts)

Your mental health will thank you. 

Scheduling 'fun days' becomes MORE IMPORTANT as you get older, when your responsibilities increase and your free time and opportunities for fun decrease.

This is critically important if you follow a "Kratom Lifestyle", where you will be more than content pretty much every second of the day if you are doing it correctly.

If you need another reason to schedule fun - 


Depression and productivity/efficiency DO NOT MATCH.

Depressed people, no matter how well they hide themselves in their work/job or how strong their denial, are never as productive or efficient as they could be.

Depressed people don't have or schedule fun - their days are spent trying to alleviate boredom for entertainment.

I completely avoid and want to puke anytime I read non-applicable self-improvement "advice" that tries to pass off suggestions like "Be Confident!", "Don't Care What Other People Think!", "Be Yourself!" as insight.

I will never spit that worthless empty crap at you.

One thing I can tell you is -


Leave the house.

Do stuff you like to do.

Plan new things that might be fun.

It doesn't have to cost you a lot of money.

You can volunteer somewhere.

You can go hiking.

Websites such as Groupon and LivingSocial offer great inexpensive deals on things you've never done but always wanted to try.

Your goal(s) can wait.

Until tomorrow.

Make sure you are alive and not just breathing.

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Hi, Chris from Good Looking Loser. "Get a Life" is our safe for work, non-adult site that features lifestyle, health/fitness and style information. Feel free to leave a comment!

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  • Great post Chris, reminds me of the quote by Steve Jobs:

    “I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.”

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  • Thank you very much

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  • Omar Little

    Great post, and something I'm sorely lacking in my life. So many fun things to try out, I never huge round to doing it

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  • Just gotta schedule one every month or so.

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  • CoolGuy

    Man, you just described my life for the last year. All my life I was told to be afraid of obsession. But ever since you and Victor suggested to embrace it my life changed. The last half a year I left university and got a full time job despite the protests of my family. It was a risky affair, there was no guarantee that I would have found a job, plus it would have tooken from the time I was supposed to be at the university, I had to choose between the 2, so I said fuck it, I left university and spent all time looking for a job. It took me 2 months to find a job, it was a period of uncertainty, wrecked nerves, depression. Things only got worse. When my parents found out that I left university they stopped sending me money. I couldn't even buy food or pay the bills. So instead of having to earn 800 $ I initially planned, now I had to earn another 1500 $ on top of that to pay my billd, debt, food and transport. To make shit worse I lost my documents, the only document I had left, allowed me to stay there for 2 months. I had a time limit. So now I had to earn 2000 $ + at a minimal wage job, with no stable schedule and also figure out something with the documents in just 2 months, while having almost no food for a while and a ton of bills and debt. When I asked for 100 $ from my parents for food , they said : "should have listened to your mom and stay at the university, fool, now you are on your own'. I got suicidal, I slept 2 hours a day, ate very little, almost got fired, had my sallary hold away from me for a month., etc. I even broke one of my phones in a fist of anger, using my old one now.

    Long story short: It was tough, had to learn to sleep 2 hours at night and a few hundred calories a day. Even now, as I am righting this, it is over midnight and I have to wake at 3:30 am. But you know what. I have 3 days left. I am leaving for my country to renew my documents.

    I managed to pay 4 months of rent and bills, a 200 $ debt and earned around at least 600 $ on top of that ( my goal was 800, initially) in just 2 months. I aslo figured everything with the documents and will be leaving this weekend.

    Even though I have only 1 memorable event so far ( visited a nearby city once), I went though a lot of adventure while doing this, like the time I forget my train ticket and pretended to have a diharea and heart attack at the same time and went locked myself inside the toilet till my station to escape the train checker, or the one time my stupid friend I travelled with to my job threw away our train tickets we were also supposed to use for the bus. He didn't remember in which trash bin he threw them and we only had 5 minutes till the bus came. So I ran around like crazy around the train station and searched every trash bin while people looked at me, found them just in time though :)

    I have 2 months of vacation in front of me now, so I will have time to recover. I lost 20 pounds, but managed to recover more than 15 back, now that I have food. Anyway, thank you Chris, Victor and all the other bloggers who helped me with this. Your words changed my life. I have becomen a disciplined, goal-oriented person. I accomplish feats I thought impossible 1 year ago. Like sleeping 2 hours. Waking at 3:30 am everyday, working hard. Managing to keep my resolve and fight till the end. I have achieved every goal I set until now. Last semester, Fall 2014 I had the goal of having a fuck-buddy and improving my looks. I shaved myself bald back then and now have cool hair and the fuck-buddy turned into a loyal girlfriend that supports me to this day. This semester, I wanted to earn money for my website and PE devices and also pay my bills. And I did it mostly. I will wait till my sallary to see how much exactly I earned, but it should be over 600 $. I have some difficulties taking them out though, I guess I might have to wait till August when I come back with the documents. I plan to pay for the hosting of my site and buy some PE devices. My goal for the next semester is to find a part-time job, so I can study and work. Earn money for a tooth-whitening tray and better clothes. This is a public declaration so I stay accountable and don't slack too much.

    Anyway Chris, thank you for everything you taught me. Now I KNOW I can do anything I set myself to. I'm not a day-dreamer anymore. I am an achiever. All the ideas you preach : obsession, no plan B, red pill lifestyle, etc. I live with this everyday. I don't worry over small things like grades and degrees, I think big. I try get skills and enjoy my life. The only reason I stay at the university is because studying is free, and I plan to get some government benefits( they give them to those who study and work at the same time). My long-term goals include learning the language of the country I'm in ( didn't have time for this until now), move to a bigger city, get a job in sales, start earning passive income. And I KNOW I will achieve that, thanks to what you taught me. Thanks to you and all the guys affiliated with this site. You are my heroes. I plan to start my own website, and you guys set a very high standard for me I will have to keep up with. Thank you for everything.

    Sorry for wall of text. If you don't wish to post it because it is too big, I'm fine. This is just my personal thanks. Should have probably send it through the e-mail, but I hope you receive it either way. Thanks a lot.

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  • thats some awesome feedback! - would you mind sharing it in the forum?

    It helps to convince guys to GO FOR IT and not be indecisive with where they invest their time. ONE GOAL. ONE DAY AT A TIME.

    Waking up at 4-5am is GREAT.

    btw- just copy and paste your comment, don't type it all again!

    Comment last edited on about 9 months ago by Good Looking Loser
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