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How to Get Out of Your Comfort Zone (Zuberi) #5

How to Get Out of Your Comfort Zone
(and Start Living Up To Your FULL POTENTIAL)

From: Zuberi
(Good Looking Loser.com Superstar Contributor)

This is the 5th installment in our much celebrated "Success Principles".

mao-red-book-propoganda-2I Will Check This Blog Four Times a Day!

Forward by Good Looking Loser

Like most successful blogs, we use endless propaganda and an array of mind control tactics to tell our readers WHAT and HOW to think, while also highly discouraging you from thinking for yourself.

Such thinking is dangerous and can lead to masturbation.

Plus you might TAKE ACTION, improve your life and not need to read the blog anymore. We can't allow that.

Today, however, you are briefly permitted to think for yourself and even encouraged to spend 30 minutes doing the exercise below.

(Thank you, Dear Leader!)

(YOU'RE WELCOME)

I don't usually have much "introspective" stuff on the main blog because it discourages action (even though it may make me look "smart"), but this piece on "Comfort Zone" by Zuberi is well done and it's something that he has legitimately expanded.

Big time.

~A year ago he couldn't go on dates , had approach anxiety and was playing "hard to get" with average girls that already liked him. Now he is sleeping with some of the prettiest girls in his entire city. Zuberi had a lot going for him. His looks, style and general coolness (swag factor) were all significantly above-average. His challenge was ALMOST SOLELY in expanding his comfort zone, executing and not getting distracted by other bookworm "authorities" that offered nothing but non-applicable insight.

Needless to say, Zuberi has had some of the fastest and best success of anyone on GoodLookingLoser.com and will continue to.

A Comfort Zone is a Scary Place to Be

Do the following exercise for a minute-

  • Draw a big circle- the outer circle symbolizes your FULL POTENTIAL.
  • Place one dot in the middle- this dot is YOU.
  • Now make a circle around that dot- this circle is how you feel you are currently LIVING UP to your full potential.

I know. It’s pretty scary at first.

A couple years ago when I was depressed and miserable, I read about this exercise in a book called Psycho-Cybernetics. It blew my reality wide open.

In the beginning, it probably looked something like this:

1st Circle

I always felt I was underachieving, but now I actually visualized it and that’s when things started happening. I want you to do the same, because it’s such a liberating insight.

By actually SEEING that you are underachieving, you will know that you need to take more/different actions to reach your FULL potential.

But here is the cool part:

Perceived Limits are Just That- Perceived.

Once you start taking more action consistently in different directions (I’ll talk about this in a minute) you will be expanding your ‘potential’.

Ultimately, you will reach a point that feels like this:

2nd Circle-edit

Only to discover that it’s actually more like this:

3rd Circle

We often believe that there are limits in our lives or that we are simply not ‘that guy’. But it’s not true. It’s just perceived potential. It’s what we think we are worth and capable of because we listened to society and people around us too much. Start dreaming again.

COMFORT ZONE & POTENTIAL

Now here is the cool thing. Your COMFORT ZONE equals your FULL POTENTIAL. The more you PUSH out of your comfort zone, the more you will grow as a person and thus, expand what is possible and what you believe is possible (your perceived potential). I’ll give you an example:

comfort zone illustration

When I just started ‘cold approaching’ chicks after having met Chris, my initial perceived potential was probably along the lines of-

"If I could bang just two girls this year that would be awesome."

I sure as hell wasn’t COMFORTABLE walking up to random chicks, let alone screen them- but I did it. It’s where the FUCKING MAGIC HAPPENS.

Pushing my comfort zone consistently allowed me to grow as a person, meaning-

  • gaining new insights (and actually applying them)
  • gaining a new, healthy outlook on life (and actually apply it)
  • improved confidence and perception (that I actually use)
  • improved skills with chicks (that I actually use)
  • improved lifestyle (that I actually live)

After a while, I was living up to my initially perceived ‘full potential’ (banging two chicks). Then I discovered that this is nothing and that I deserved and could do MORE. Guess what? My perceived potential changed, and I expanded my comfort zone even more. Now banging 2 hot & different chicks every month if I put in the time & effort is perfectly doable. That’s because I pushed. You need to do the same.

Initially your comfort zone & full potential will look like this:

comfort-zone-examined

After taking action beyond your comfort zone repeatedly it will eventually look like this:

comfort-zone-2

And then like this:

comfort-zone-3Baby steps... Right?

Sound familiar? It should.

Are you GROWING or DYING?

Pushing your comfort zone over and over and over again means that you are growing. It could be slow, it could be fast, but you are growing, which is the opposite of DYING.

Think about it.

A tree is always either growing or dying. It might be dying at a very slow pace, or growing at a very slow pace, but it will always be one of the two; it’s never just ‘there’.

A book has a front (positive) and a back (negative). If I would open the book, it would still have a front and a back. Each page has a front and a back. Even if the page was so small that it could only be seen with a microscope, it would still have a front and a back.

A battery has a negative and a positive.

It’s such a fundamental thing in life but we seem to forget it. There is no ‘in between’.

growing or dying

Look around you next time when you are walking down the street. Most people look and feel miserable. They never REALLY push themselves. They think that "that’s just not who they are," and they never even THINK about EXPLORING their perceived boundaries by taking action.

And you know what? That's just not who they are.

That's a choice though and it was meant to be for certain people.

Girl Holding Bank NotesDestroy Fears ASAP

What you fear is generally something that is beyond your current comfort zone.

Talking to that hot chick in a group with five other girls for example, might be something you fear.

What I found is that-

  • When you IDENTIFY a fear
  • You need to face it AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
  • And Destroy it.

That’s when you will be growing rapidly, and making huge gains in life.

The lives we live are bound only by our current fears.

This is what you should do-

1) Write down THREE things that you currently fear, but know deep down are things you NEED to do in order to GROW-

For example:

FEAR

  • heights
  • talking to hot chicks
  • saying no to people

2) Then decide on SPECIFIC ACTIONS that would give you the BEST results in the LEAST AMOUNT OF TIME -

ACTION

  • get skydiving certificate by *April 20th, 2013*
  • say NO every time you are having doubts *on going*

How do you know you are on the right track?

An easy way to know if you are on the right track (apart from just gut feeling, which we all have) is by asking 2 basic questions-

  • What do I put in?
  • What do I get out?

It’s just like one of those kinetic ball things you had when you were younger:

kinetic-ball-thing

If you grab ONE ball and let it hit the others, ONE ball will bounce out , not two, not three, just one.

Why?

Because you only put ONE in. If you grab TWO, there will be TWO balls bouncing out.

Get it?

Simple. I swear, life has so many abstract solutions for problems that supposedly are so complicated- it’s amazing.

What you put in however, does need to be DIRECTED. I could be practicing basketball for ten hours a day, but if I actually want to play baseball, I’ll be wasting my energy. This might seem like a weird comparison, but it’s just the way life works.

What you put in (ACTIONS) What you get out (RESULTS)
Nothing Still afraid of heights
NO APPROACHING No sex
Saying no sometimes Situations you don’t want

Like Chris mentions, your #1 Goal should also be your #1 Priority.

If it's not, you probably aren't going anywhere fast. Misapplied time and energy is a recipe for stagnation, quitting and ultimately- failure.

I strongly suggest you write down your current RESULTS in different areas of your life.

Then ask yourself: What actions am I taking and are they directed?

If it turns out you are putting in a shitload of work (actions) but your results suck, you need to change your approach (DIRECTION).

Funny New Year's Eve greeting card - Skydiving yearNow Go Out and Make Magic Happen

Things don’t magically improve.

  • No girl magically comes by and wishes to fuck you or be your girlfriend (only in the movies because it's FICTION).
  • You don’t magically get ripped.
  • You don’t magically grow a bigger dick.
  • You don’t magically get a social life.
  • You don’t magically improve your financial situation.

Instead, THINK about (and write down)-

  • Your biggest fears
  • What those fears are doing to your life
  • SPECIFIC ACTION steps that you can take TODAY to start to kill those fears

Then make a plan that begins with the SPECIFIC ACTION steps listed above.

The fear you target should be the one you MOST want to kill.

Make it your #1 goal and #1 priority.

Work on that one until it is done. Then find another goal to slaughter. Repeat.

Ultimately, you’ll realize that there is so much more in you than you ever thought possible.

My goal with this article was to make you realize that there is so much more you can do, be, and have- you just need to blossom and grow into a big powerful tree.

"Insight or intelligence not applied is not insight or intelligence; it's called - a waste of time."

- Good Looking Loser

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Comments (12)

  1. Boy Toy

B-e-a-utiful!
Lets kill that fucking comfort zone!!!
Like yesterday, when i got my hair cut at a stylist-school, where I hit on a hairdresser in front of all her friends. I didnt get her number but I fucking pushed my limits!!!

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  1. Zuberi

haha nice! How did you go about it? Im curious to know

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  1. cyclONE

nice article, altough the promise we can achieve everything we want if we push the c-zone got to be corrected: We can achieve everything , BUT withing our realistic limits. Yes, I can possibly get laid regularly , since every healthy male is...

nice article, altough the promise we can achieve everything we want if we push the c-zone got to be corrected: We can achieve everything , BUT withing our realistic limits. Yes, I can possibly get laid regularly , since every healthy male is naturally able to so. Yes I can beat my social anxiety since every healthy human being has the ability to effective communicate with others. No , I will never be able to work in any profession where logical and mathematical IQ is required. No , I will never be a social superstar (even if I wanted to). We all have our strenghts and weaknesses , making us unique.
The mainstream ,,Everybody can become a millionaire´´ is bullshit. Sad thing is , there is limit to growth.Good thing is , growth within our limits is unlimited.

And that quote below is some true history book shit ( Who said this ,Chris? )
I missed Zuberis in-depth personal transformation story, tough . A separate section of people ,who changed their live with the aid of GLL is needed.

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  1. Good Looking Loser    cyclONE

yes- you are totally correct.

The notion everything you think you can't do is a "limited belief" is bullshit.

I want to grow wings and fly, but it's not going to happen no matter how much I study or how much $ I give away to internet...

yes- you are totally correct.

The notion everything you think you can't do is a "limited belief" is bullshit.

I want to grow wings and fly, but it's not going to happen no matter how much I study or how much $ I give away to internet marketers. Just as Aaron Sleazy won't be playing Center in the NBA no matter how much "practice" he gets (his analogy). It has nothing to do with attitude.

The main problem is- most people (generally outside of self-improvement) sell themselves short rather than too far. It's related to self-esteem. Successful people tend to be successful at a lot of things, "unsuccessful" people tend to be just that.

People in self-improvement tend to get excited and make unrealistic goals. don't achieve them, and quit.

thanks for writing in.

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  1. Good Looking Loser    cyclONE

oh I just made up that quote

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  1. Horny

This is so true: I don't even know how much Im capable of until I push it to the limit. Lately I've been doing things that I never though I could do one year ago. AA drills and approaching really expand one's comfort zone rapidly.

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  1. Robert F

This is some great shit! Yes, it's true that when you push yourself a little further than you would've thought was your limit, you start growing rapidly. I began working on social anxiety, and beat it in a matter of a couple weeks, and I'm...

This is some great shit! Yes, it's true that when you push yourself a little further than you would've thought was your limit, you start growing rapidly. I began working on social anxiety, and beat it in a matter of a couple weeks, and I'm currently cutting down approach anxiety by walking up to women and asking for the time as a part of the AA drills. Last Monday I walked up to two women and asked for the time simutaneously, two times! Took me exactly 1 3/4 hours to just do that, while I was mostly greeting a lot of random people. Then just yesterday I did the exact same thing, and then one more woman. I walked up to five women and asked for the time, and that took a quick 8 minutes! Shit you, I'm not! And while I find I get exhausted the day after I did the drills, my comfort zone is much bigger than it used to be last year, and I could only talk to my friends and people I knew that time! I'm very grateful I discovered GoodLookingLoser, otherwise I would still have social and approach anxiety.. And a lot of it!

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  1. Robert F

Over a year ago I couldn't even say hi to a random person, I could only talk to people I knew.. Fast forward to one year, and now I've completely overcome social anxiety, and even walked up to 5 women and asked for the time (two women at the same...

Over a year ago I couldn't even say hi to a random person, I could only talk to people I knew.. Fast forward to one year, and now I've completely overcome social anxiety, and even walked up to 5 women and asked for the time (two women at the same time, twice, and one woman, once), in just 8 minutes, and I just started working on AA this week! When you feel exhausted the next day, that means you are recovering, and your comfort zone is expanding.

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  1. Zuberi

Great job Horny! Pushing your comfort zone is so important.

@cycLONE
You are right- there are definitely some limits. BUT, the point of the article was to make guys realize that what they think is possible is often just the beginning. so few of...

Great job Horny! Pushing your comfort zone is so important.

@cycLONE
You are right- there are definitely some limits. BUT, the point of the article was to make guys realize that what they think is possible is often just the beginning. so few of us dare to dream and take action anymore and I wanted to inspire others to push through their comfort zone repeatedly.

The transformation stories your referring to will probably come later- I think Chris has some plans with that but not sure

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  1. Pampgun

Lezuberi,

Great insights shared. I can completely relate to that in not only one, but hundreds of areas of my own life. And just like you, I have realised that there's only one correct way to expanding the comfort zone and improving one's...

Lezuberi,

Great insights shared. I can completely relate to that in not only one, but hundreds of areas of my own life. And just like you, I have realised that there's only one correct way to expanding the comfort zone and improving one's life:

1. Have a goal.
2. See what is holding you back (mostly fears).
3. Crush the fears.

And the only way to crush the fears is to realise that the fear is there, and then take appropriate action. These fears are the inner daemons we need to find and eliminate once and for all. Only then can we have a clear and realistic view on things. Successful people I've studied have one very remarkable personality trait:

They have a knee-jerk reaction when a fear comes up. They've conditioned themselves to recognise the fear in the moment it comes up and take action straight away (split seconds after the fear comes up). Applied to talking to girls, it's like the "3 second rule", but a far more conscious thought process than people in the community realised back in the days. And after some time of practising the knee-jerk reaction to fear, it diminishes until it finally disappears. As Richard Bandler put it: "All fears are conditioned, so they can be unconditioned". I've looked through Chris' Drill program and it is extremely well designed to eliminate the fear in new guys on the block. I wish I had a drill like that when I started out.

I think, a very important point raised by Chris and you is this: "I want to grow wings and fly, but it’s not going to happen no matter how much I study or how much $ I give away to internet marketers." [ reply was... "So what?!" I'll better suffer now for a unspecified amount of time (turned out to be 2 years since starting out with PU) than suffer my whole life. It's the same friends who come to me now and say "I wish I had your confidence, abilities, health, fitness, etc. you name it". Don't get me wrong, I love and respect my friends. But I've offered my hand, advice and time to them to work on their issues. Only a few took the red pill. So it's up to everyone personally. So again, I'm glad you guys have this blog and forum to bring people together who WANT to expand their comfort zones and you provide the directions.

Sorry, for the long rant! I get carried away when I see an interesting topic these days! :P

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  1. G-Freedom

Chris - a tool i use as a little game which can help is the "dice game". you write down 6 options on a dice, things that'll make you get out of your routine and comfort zone. you roll the dice and you follow it, NO EXCUSES. I did that when i was...

Chris - a tool i use as a little game which can help is the "dice game". you write down 6 options on a dice, things that'll make you get out of your routine and comfort zone. you roll the dice and you follow it, NO EXCUSES. I did that when i was 18 and it landed "Go to Australia". I bought the ticket the very next day. I cannot explain to you how life changing that was and where it has led me.

Also I got a lot of buddies at home who complain there are no jobs. I've never had that problem cause I'll go work anywhere in the world. I'll go to Iraq if i have to. Truth that the only limits exist in your head, that first trip to Asutralia taught me that for life.

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  1. MAD

Your examples are simply great! Thank you!

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